I always knew I was a baby boomer actually to get specific part of the Jones Generation (late baby boomers) but I never heard of being part of the sandwich generation until the other day.  In case you are like me and are not up on the current vernacular the sandwich generation refers to the fact that we may or may not have our children still living with us while we are caregivers to our elderly parents….thus being sandwiched between two generations.

Anyway a lot has been happening since my last post. I hooked up with some internationally known medical professionals and created a Home Safety Guide as well as a second blog with my team.  The guide contains my life experiences being a Baby Boomer caregiver and how little things that we baby boomers do not think about or even see in our home can actually kill our elderly parents.  It is not an exhaustive document but it covers many of the things that we need to be aware of in the home.  You can read about “Raising Parents – A Guide To Keeping Your Home Safe For The Elderly”

As far as the blog is concerned, my partners and I started the blog to provide baby boomers with a place to find information on life, health and wealth topics. One of our contributing partners provided an very interesting article on male bladder cancer that you find at Baby Boomers Lifestyle . I hope you will visit the site and leave a comment.

Well that is all for today.
Thanks for stopping.

Ah yes we Baby Boomers are the sandwich generation. When I first heard that I thought hmm what does that mean and after a little and I mean a little research it was very clear and correct. We are the generation that is caring for our children and our parents so we are sandwiched between generations. Who ever thought that one up is a very clever person.

Well I know it seems that I essentially abandoned this site but that isn’t exactly true. I have been busy in my real job but on weekends and after work I have been developing web sites and affiliate marketing.

If you have been following me, you know that I write many technical reports specifically in the environmental field, for my clients. One day last month I decided to develop a guide for Baby Boomers that are actually care giving for their parents.

Did you know that,

According the US Centers For Disease Control and I quote:

• “In 2007, 81% of fall deaths were among people 65 and older.

• Men are more likely to die from a fall. After adjusting for age, the fall fatality rate in 2007 was 46% higher for men than for women.

• Older whites are 2.5 times more likely to die from falls as their black counterparts.”

The guide is all about home safety as it relates Baby Boomers and to your elderly parents. Let’s face it Baby Boomers we are not getting younger so much of the content also relates to us as we get older.  The guide is a compilation of my experience while being a caregiver for my father and I use real world experience here.  I have included diagrams, photos and figures so that you can actually see some of the safety issues that you probably would never be aware of otherwise.  I also provide links so that you don’t have to search for more information regarding that topic.  Here is a list of the seven chapters in the guide

• Home Security
• Aging Bodies & General Safety
• Universal Design Concepts
• Access Concerns
• Ramps
• Bathroom Safety
• Kitchen Safety

As part of the purchase price, I have included an extensive check list that you can go through to determine if your parent’s home or your home for that matter is safe.  If you would like to read more just Click Here. I mean let’s face it we Baby Boomers need all of the information we can get on safety.  I don’t know how much your parents safety is worth but the safety of my elderly father is worth quite a bit to me in this stage of my life.

And you know what? So far, it looks as if that’s about right (yes, some people have died of swine flu complications, but a lot less than were initially expected). I have to admit that I was starting to feel the same way, but I have just finished reading a book called “Survive Pandemic Flu – Understand and Protect Against Novel Strains Of Influenza”, and what I found out is that looks can be deceiving when it comes to strains of flu. The author points out that the last time we saw a flu strain like this novel H1N1 strain begin spreading around the world, it ended with the deaths of about 100 million people.

It did not happen that long ago either. It was 1918, less than a century ago. An H1N1 strain came out of nowhere at about the same time of the year, spring time, and then vanished a month or two later without causing much of a problem. But then it came back in the fall.

This time it was completely changed, and that dopey virus that caused little loss of sleep in the early part of the year was suddenly dropping people in their tracks. Those that turned blue did not last very long, and in most cities around the world they quickly ran out of coffins and had to stack corpses in makeshift piles and bury them in mass graves.

Well, I could go on about the obvious parallels between the strain that emerged in 1918 and the one we are dealing with in 2009. But really, I would only be scratching the surface of a very involved story that actually goes back to Abraham Lincoln and something he did during the Civil War. Something which guaranteed that even if nature acting on its own does not come up with a twin version of that 1918 strain, we may yet get to experience it again anyway.

That was just one of the surprising things I discovered in Survive Pandemic Flu, and I can guarantee you that those “idiot” WHO officials that we all laughed at earlier when they raised the alarm and then nothing bad seemed to happen, well, they aren’t quite the idiots we made them out to be. Not by a long shot.

Trust me, if you think all those swine flu warnings were hype and that our troubles are now behind us, then you are going to be one of the 99 percent of the population that gets caught with its pants down when the nasty hits the fan. No one knows whether it will be this year, the next, or five years from now. But if you would rather be among the one percent whose family isn’t taken by surprise, get a hold of this book. Heck, for the cost of cheap family meal you get an education that might just save the life of a family member one day.

So drop what you are doing, and check out
Survive Pandemic Flu
right now so that you can get prepared well ahead of time. I know that my family is going to be a lot better off for me having learned what is in this book, and what I can do to make sure they are protected as much as possible against any pandemic threat – no matter when it makes its appearance.

Usually when someone tells you that some book they are recommending may be the most important one you will read this year, you already KNOW that it is a line. But in this case, that’s just not true. At any rate, you can decide for yourself when you go check it out. You can thank me later for pointing you in the right direction.

You can get a copy by Clicking Here

At the very least, sign up to grab the introductory chapters of the book. If you read those and you still think you and your family have nothing to fear from the next pandemic you will at least know where to find the information later if you discover you were wrong.

People have been questioning for years the ethical argument regarding putting elderly people into nursing homes. Some people think that putting the elderly in places where they can be properly cared for is right, while others think that the abandonment of an elderly person’s family just because of the complications is wrong.

But we’re not here to discuss that question. You are here, my friend, to learn about elder day care.

You should see elder day care as an acceptable compromise between the two sides of the nursing home argument. After all, your parents took care of you, so you should share some responsibility in taking care of them.

This responsibility is misinterpreted by some Americans to be purely financial, when it is not. Trust me to try the solution we have for every problem: throw money at it.

No, caring for the elderly entails an emotional responsibility to the people who took care of you when you could not take care of yourself.

Elder day care shows the possibility that you can take care of the elderly while living a normal hectic lifestyle.

With elder day care, you need not worry about your elderly getting the proper care that they need with the love of your family.

Nursing homes can be such sad places. Everyone wants to stay with his/her family. You can be sure that, no matter how much he/she denies it, your elderly wants to stay with your family.

However, elderly people do not also want to be a burden. You are their family, after all, and they do not wish for you to suffer because of them.

They do, however, want to feel loved. With elder day care, you can give them love and care. Having the services of an elder day care means that you need not send your elderly to a nursing home. You can drop them off and then pick them up again.

This would give your elderly time to reminisce among their colleagues and have their social lives while you go about your activities.

You can be sure that they will be thankful for you introducing them to the concept of elder day care.

With an elder day care, your interactions are not limited by the visiting hours. After all, your elderly will still live with you, in your home.

Elder day care is a novel idea because it actually reconciles the American way of living with the American way of family.

With the passing of the years, the American dream has overtaken the American sense of heritage. The word family has been scoffed and the word “elderly” has been attached to the word “burden”.

We need to take the image of a family-based America back, and we need to do it without upsetting the American way of business.

So far, elder day care has provided the best solution to do this.

Right now, the business of elder day care is still in its infancy. Only a few people operate these elder day care services, and most of those people are ordinary individuals who have realized the advantages this type of business offers.

We live in a world where compromise is very important. And since elder day care provides a great compromise to the betterment of the American way of living, why not take advantage of it?

Many adults find themselves in the situation of caring for an aging parent or perhaps more than one. There are many different options available which are aimed to help those who are the caregivers for elderly family members; but the only way to be able to choose between these different options is to assess your own situation. In some cases, it is the best option for everyone involved if the aging person goes into a care facility; however, in less severe cases, it may be possible to arrange for the person to stay at home by adding a few home health care options into the person’s life.

One of the major decisions is where the elderly parent will live. For many working adults, it is much easier to take care of an elderly parent if they agree to move into the son or daughter’s home. In this way, many people can continue working and spending time with their families as well as take care of an elderly parent. Depending on the health and independence of the aging parent, different amounts of extra help might be needed. It may be the case that the parent can be home alone all day, but if that is not the case, there are plenty of organizations and people to turn to in order to get some help and support in the caregiving process.

One option is to find an adult day care center where healthier elderly people can go during the day in order to socialize and stay active with other people. At such a day care facility, people play games, listen to music together, organize trips and have lunch as a group. For most elderly people, this is much preferred over sitting home alone every day. Many aging people are not amenable to the idea of an adult day care center, but do remind them that they won’t know if they like it or not until they’ve tried it. Most elderly people who go to such a center end up being huge fans of the arrangement.

If your aging parent is not in good enough condition to go to a recreational adult day care center, you could also check to see if there’s a center in your area that includes health care. Such centers exist, they are just fewer and far between. These care centers are an excellent option for having an aging parent taken care of during the day while you are at work without having to put them into a nursing home.

Home care is also an option, although it offers fewer social benefits for the aging patient. Home care can either take on the form of medical care brought into the home or it can be as simple as hiring someone to come over an hour before lunch to do a little cleaning, having lunch with the aging parent and then cleaning up, visiting for a while, and then going on their way again. Depending on the type of home care that is necessary, the range in price is huge. Home health care can get very expensive very quickly, but having a local come over for a few hours every day can be very affordable and produce significantly satisfying results.

Talk with your aging parent to get a feel for what it is that they would like to do in terms of getting their needs met without moving to a nursing home. Also, talk to your siblings and other family members to see what everyone else thinks and to see if anyone is willing to help. For many families, the constraint of cost makes it necessary to keep all of the adult caregiving within the family, and even if that’s not, per se, necessary, it can be a very nice experience for all involved to each have a hand in the caregiving process. If one person does all of the caregiving, it grows very stressful and very tiring, but if ten family members each spend two hours a week, you might all enjoy it so much that you’ll never want to hire home care!

Acting as a caregiver for a family member is a tremendous responsibility. No one can really appreciate just how much work is involved unless they have been there themselves, and the toll acting as a caregiver takes on your is physical as well as emotional. Admitting just how difficult a task caring for someone else is a crucial part of providing good care for your loved one as well as yourself. Most people believe that they have to put their own needs last when they take on this role, but nothing could be further from the truth. Compromising your own needs in turn compromises the needs of the person you’re trying to help, because if you are not functioning at your full level, then you are not giving them the best care you can. Focusing on yourself is an integral part of helping your sick family member.

Of course, this is easier said than done, especially if the person you are caring for is a parent. Most people feel guilty about saying that providing care for a parent is a burden – after all, this is the person who cared for you when you were child. The fact is – caring for someone full time IS a burden. You can’t do it alone. Your first step in respecting your own needs when caring for someone else is to admit that you have them. Admit to yourself that you can’t do everything alone, and that you have to have the time and space to take of yourself. If making peace with this fact is difficult for you, consider reaching out to support groups for caregivers in your area or ask your doctor to refer to a therapist. These people can help you come to terms with the tough choices you need to make to protect your own well being.

Once you have admitted that you need help, it’s time to get some. Resist taking on the role of the only person who can help the family member you are looking after. Get other family members or friends on board so you can get a much needed break. Ask them to help you cook dinners. Ask them to come over and sit with your family member for awhile so you can get out and visit friends, do some shopping, see a movie – whatever you enjoy doing. The added benefit of getting other people involved in the caring process is that it becomes a self fulfilling cycle. People will stop assuming that you’ll shoulder the responsibility and will step up and take some of the burden off of you more and more.

If there simply isn’t anyone you can ask for help, then carve out time for yourself the best way you can. Get frequent exercise, carve out a time in the day where you get to do whatever you want, even if you simply spend some quiet time reading or taking a bath. Likewise, give yourself a break on the little things. Hire a cleaning team, or evaluate whether or not you’re doing more housekeeping than you need to. Find a good takeout service that you can use when you need a break from cooking. Don’t take on additional favors for family and friends – learn to say no.

Caregivers have a history of falling into depression, alcohol abuse and other problems, and you need to look after yourself so you stay healthy. It may feel selfish to you at the time, but every break you take is an act of love for the person you care for – you need to feel your best to treat them with the compassion and care you want them to have.

• Physical Layout
• Time Sinks
• Family Activities
• Pets

Before we dive into this, I have to say that each of these will depend upon the physical situation of your loved one. I my case, when Dad came to live with me he was still independent and driving with no issues related to memory or physical limitations.  Remember many of the things posted on this blog are things that I saw during my voyage bringing up a parent and may or may not apply to you.

Physical Layout

Look around at your house and yard.  Ask the following:

• Are there tripping hazards?
• Are there handrails for the walkways?
• How are the steps going affect acces?
• Are there visability issues?

Tripping hazards and handrails are two most important things to consider.  It seems to me that as we age, gravity challenges us more  and more.  The older we get the more gravity pulls on us which is why it is important to eliminate tripping hazards and to make sure that all steps have strong handrails.

Balancing Work and Your Role As Your Parents Caregiver

Published by  Deena Hawley

Everyone who has a job and a family knows how difficult it can be to manage both responsibilities. But when you are a caregiver for a family member, this balance can become nearly impossible to manage. No longer are you trying to figure out how you are going to get to the meeting and to the Little League game. Now you’re wondering how you’re going to get to the office and make sure your parent is safe and cared for. You have to worry about who is looking after them when you’re not there, if you’re going to be able to leave the office in time to relieve the help, getting them to all of their medical appointments – the list goes on and on. Of course, once you take on the role of caregiver, you may actually end up missing a lot of work, which may make you worried about keeping your job.

Most caregivers cannot afford to give up their jobs – and in many cases, most of them don’t want to. If you’ve built up a career, even if it’s is not a financial necessity, it can be difficult to walk away from. Maybe it is the only thing that gets you out of the house and without your job, you would only have the task of providing care day in and day out. Whatever your reason for wanting to balance your job while you balance your responsibilities as a caretaker, you should know that it can be done. You just have to know where to turn for help and be willing to ask for what you need.

You may be surprised to find out that your biggest ally might be your employer. Employees have a tendency to try and hide the fact that they are providing care for someone from their bosses because they’re worried that they may get skipped over for promotions and that it might make them look uncommitted to their work. In reality, however, most companies are aware that these circumstances are very common and have programs in place to try and accommodate their employees who are caring for a parent. Your company may have financial assistance programs to help you hire home help to look after your parent while you work or to help you pay for adult day care. Your company may also be able to help you find counseling help or other support that you need to cope with your new responsibilities.

Even if your company doesn’t have such a program, you should know that in the US, you are entitled to take up to 12 weeks leave of absence per year from your job to care for a sick relative without worry about losing your job or any of your benefits. The catch is that the leave is unpaid, so this might not be a financial possibility for many caregivers.

If you can’t afford to quit working, look into alternative solutions that might help you juggle your new schedule. See if your company offers job share programs or if they can allow you to work from home at least a few days a week. See if one of your siblings may be able to get some time off from their jobs more easily than you to take off some of the burden. Last but not least, if your company is completely inflexible and unwilling to work with you, then you may need to look for a new job. Millions of Americans care for their parents, and many companies out there are willing and able to accommodate employees who do so.

Having received my third invitation to join AARP I just had to share this with you all.  Now I don’t consider myself ready to join AARP because i don’t think of myself as a senior or senior citizen.  Knowing that I am in the baby boom age group I did a Google search on how many senior citizens there really are in the United States and I was very surprised.  Here is the break down from SeniorJournal.com

• As of July 1, 2004 there were 36.3 million people over the age of 65 which reflects 12% of the total population.  Also, 351,000 people entered this group between 2003 and 2004.
• The number of people over 85 during the same date was 4.9 million
• Here is the astounding statistic 86.7 million people will 65 or older by 2050 that is a 147% increase

Yikes !! I suppose the 85 and older crowd probably have some type of caregiver or in assisted living but just think about the strain on the families as we approach 2050.  I have a caregiver for my 95 year old father and I have to say I thank her everyday for what she does for both him and me.   As I mentioned in my earlier post, Dad has been living with me since 1997 and up until recently he has been self-sufficient.  This past spring however he started get forgetful and I knew it was time to start really thinking about how to make sure he was fine when I travel for work.  My 21 year old daughter and he are the same personnality what I call “hard headed”.  You know the type that can’t admit they are wrong about something so they continue to press their point never getting anywhere.  I knew that I didn’t want him in a nursing home or I guess the in phrase is assisted living but I also didn’t know much about senior care.  What I found is that Medicare will provide elderly care services if the person is home bound.  Well Dad still liked to visit his friends at the senior citizen’s center so that was out.  After careful consideration and research I finally contracted to a private elderly care service and after a few months I realized that I didn’t have a clue about caring for my Dad.  This decision was the best thing I have done in a long time.

As part of my quest for knowlege on this subject I tripped over a guide by Deena Hawley.  In her guide,  entitled “Today’s Caregivers Guide”  she covers:

• Medical Coordinators
• Financial Planning
• Housekeepers
• Personal Assistants
• Cooks
• Shoppers
• Home Maintenance Personnel
• Home Managers
• Trage Specialists
• Valets
• Chauffers
• Advocates for Care
• Medical Equipment Operators and
• Personal “nurses” and “nursing aides”

To get your copy of Deena’s just “CLICK HERE”